One Down, One to Go

It’s almost never good news when someone calls you at 5 o’clock in the morning and tells you ‘Turn on your light please, we need to talk’. Cue feeling of impending doom as I stumble across the room, still half-asleep.

“Don’t get mad” Paul tells me, “but my ex just called here.”

Oh for fucks sake what does she want now???

“My divorce is final. It’s done. Over. I am now legally free to be with you.”ball-and-chain

Suddenly I didn’t care about the time. I didn’t care that I’d been woken from a sound sleep. For the moment I didn’t even care that she’d called. I just felt complete and utter relief.

It was over, his divorce was finished.

To be honest, we were both taken by surprise. There have been some holdups in his paperwork along the way, and we’ve heard nothing for ages. I had my hearing on Nov 5th, and am expecting my papers literally any day now. We both thought for sure mine would be finished first. Either way we are beyond thrilled that this major step is done, for him at least.

Friends have been asking all day what is next. Truthfully..nothing, for a good while at least. It may seem odd to some, but we always said once the divorces were final we wanted to do things properly. We know we want to be together, but we decided a long time ago there would be no engagement while either or both of us are still legally married, and when he does ask, he will be here in person to do it. We both need to get better situated financially before we start filing papers for the visa process, and I need to get settled somewhere and give my kids some time to adjust to the situation as it stands(whatever that is, no word from the court yet) before anyone new is brought into their lives.

As excited as we are to start our lives together, we are not rushing into anything. We’ve been through so much over the last year and a half, and for now we are just thrilled that a big part of the stress has been lifted off of us. We are looking forward to my legal stuff being wrapped up, and getting the chance to just be us as a couple for awhile as we rebuild ourselves and start working towards our goals for the future.

Congratulations my love. I’m so very happy for you 🙂

7 thoughts on “One Down, One to Go

  1. I applaude the way you are both handling this! This is how my (now) husband and I handled things with our kids. I’d been divorced frm an abusive man for four years, and he was just divorced from a neglectful mother (which is why he came with his daughter AND her daughter). Even for the first three months that we lived in the same house, he slept on the couch and I slept in the bedroom until the children were comfortable with our relationship. THEN we got engaged and four years later got married, this past June. The fact that you and Paul are taking this one step at a time for the children’s sake shows just how wonderful you will both be as parents!


  2. I am so happy for you! I have been reading your site for a long time, but i think this is the second time I have commented. This is great news, and I wish you both the happiness you both deserve after all this!


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