I’ve written about the misconceptions people have about depression, and how it’s so much more than just feeling blue or having a bad day. Today I got a comment that completely sums up the ignorance that is out there about this problem.

Author : John Adams (IP: 74.8.118.206 , 74.8.118.206) E-mail : lnu_2002@yahoo.com
URL : http://n/a
Whois : http://ws.arin.net/cgi-bin/whois.pl?queryinput=74.8.118.206
Comment:
Depression? This isn’t depression, this is life. So you have a life that isn’t a mansion with bulters, maids or nannies where you have plently of time to get your beauty sleep or spend time on the computer, go shopping, hang out with your friends – should anyone feel sorry for you? The question is, what are YOU going to do to change things? You can take the easy way out and point fingers and say “poor pitful me”. You think you have it so bad? You have it a lot better off than you think. If you need proof, believe me, I can provide that, but I don’t really think you want to hear it. You want a better life? Try becoming more organized. If you get your life organized, you will find enough time for sleep. Being organized it not easy that’s why most people aren’t organized. So organize your life and everything else will fall into place. Or you can take the easy way out and just feel sorry for yourself and blog about it so you can hear others tell you how they feel your pain, that’ll make you feel good for a few seconds anyway. At least, you can feel like you’ve accomplished something during your day. It must be so hard to not work and stay home and deal with YOUR kids. I’d trade places with you in a second and I’d love it and not complain once about it. How would I know? Because I’ve done it. There is no where I’d rather be 24 hours a day 365 days a year than home with my kids. You don’t know how lucky you have it – but one day, you will know how lucky you HAD it.

I don’t even know what to say.

39 Comments on I Am Speechless…And THIS is Why I Wrote About Depression.

  1. kerry
    June 29, 2007 at 3:30 pm (10 years ago)

    I also don’t even know what to say… People who comment about issues they obviously have no clue about should stop and think before they speak. What makes him an expert on YOU?

    Reply
  2. Heather
    June 29, 2007 at 3:33 pm (10 years ago)

    Regardless what this fuck ass says about being home with his kids, this line right tells me he doesn’t have any….

    If you get your life organized, you will find enough time for sleep.

    Call me stupid, why didn’t I think of that!

    Hey John, go troll around somewhere else where people are dumb enough to believe you.

    Reply
  3. Heather
    June 29, 2007 at 3:38 pm (10 years ago)

    How would I know? Because I’ve done it. There is no where I’d rather be 24 hours a day 365 days a year than home with my kids.

    Oh, NOW it makes sense! See, John DID spend 24 hours 365 days a year with his kids and is now writing his comment from an insane asylum.

    Reply
  4. Megan (Velveteen Mind)
    June 29, 2007 at 3:41 pm (10 years ago)

    I think this is what they refer to as the price of fame. Or fame-ish, in case you want to disagree. I can name every person that reads my blog, I swear, and given emails like this, sometimes I’d like to keep it that way. Such a troll.

    This is jealousy. And it is so misdirected.

    And now I’m going to go discuss our newly organized schedule with my infant so that I may begin to get more strictly scheduled sleep. I’m sure he’ll understand. You know, he’s not yet one year old and all. Logistics. It’s simple. I think I’ll hang a feeding chart over his bed to which he can refer when he wakes up at 3am.

    Reply
  5. Cakehead
    June 29, 2007 at 4:47 pm (10 years ago)

    What really pisses me off about this comment is that this person knows nothing about you other than what you write on your blog. Or maybe it’s someone you’ve pissed off in the past out for a little fun. Either way it’s ignorant. You know what? Sometimes I do feel like you have it good. You are a SAHM, you have a husband that supports you well and appears to love you despite his faults; but that doesn’t mean you don’t have issues or that you aren’t subject to depression. It doesn’t mean that you can’t write a blog to talk about it. Just because you weren’t as bad off as this John fella (or his wife who wrote this); doesn’t mean you are immune from it. Agh, I’m sorry Sara, maybe you are speechless, but I am sure there will be plenty of comments that will speak for you.

    Reply
  6. Genna
    June 29, 2007 at 5:23 pm (10 years ago)

    I am extremely organized and still battle with depression.

    Maybe I should ask John for some advice, he seems to be the expert. I guess forgetting the MD after his name was just an oversight.

    Reply
  7. Annie
    June 29, 2007 at 5:48 pm (10 years ago)

    I think maybe he’s depressed? 😉

    Reply
  8. lisa
    June 29, 2007 at 5:50 pm (10 years ago)

    John Adams or Tom Cruise?

    Reply
  9. Amanda
    June 29, 2007 at 6:24 pm (10 years ago)

    Interesting… so explain to me this. Im fairly organized , I have no kids, I get plenty of sleep…SO how the FUCK did i end up depressed? Oh great and all knowing John Adams ( or as i like to refer to him, Captain FuckWad) PLEASE tell me all about myself, since you psychic-ly know all about Sara’s life.
    THIS IS WHY I HATE HUMANS! I love people who know everything, and think they are perfect. Depression is the WORST feeling in the world, and people all over the world kill themselves because there is this stigma that hangs over someone that is depressed. “You can do something about it” “get more organized, you’ll get more sleep and not be depressed.” give me a fucking break. I hope no one close to this guy ever gets depressed.

    Reply
  10. problem girl
    June 29, 2007 at 6:45 pm (10 years ago)

    What kind of response do you think he was trying to get with this? “Oh, thanks Orgizational Asshole! You’ve made me see the error of my ways!”

    Who knew that orgaization was the cure for depression? Why aren’t doctors giving out prescriptions for daily planners and desk calenders?

    Reply
  11. CharmingDriver
    June 29, 2007 at 7:24 pm (10 years ago)

    Dear John:

    Please find time in your uber organized, well rested and mentally stable schedule to eat my ass. I would bring it to you but what with the laziness and depression, I just cain’t find tha tiiiiiiiiime!11! Mebbe with some exercise, multivitamins and a new PDA I kin aspire to be a klass act like yerself.

    Love, ME!

    Reply
  12. moosh in indy.
    June 29, 2007 at 8:36 pm (10 years ago)

    Dear John,
    Why did you spend several minutes of your life being mean to someone else when you could have spent the time with your lucky, lucky kids?

    Reply
  13. JamieE
    June 30, 2007 at 12:20 am (10 years ago)

    plently…ha I thought “organized” people knew how to spell check their own jerky criticisms.
    Obviously this person is ignorant when it comes to depression my lord!

    Reply
  14. AbsolutelyBananas
    June 30, 2007 at 12:27 am (10 years ago)

    Charming Driver said it better than I ever could. You don’t need antidepressants… just an issue to Real Simple. Gag choke cough vomit

    Reply
  15. JaniceNW
    June 30, 2007 at 1:24 am (10 years ago)

    Morons. People who have never had depression think we can pull up our bootstraps and just move on with our lives. MORONS. I have been dealing with clinical depression since 1996 when my youngest son died, my grandmother died the same day and then my 64yo mom died almost exactly a year later. It’s a chemical imbalance. It’s NOT whining or being a slacker.

    I was a chat host at AOLHealth back when AOL had chats. I hosted depression chats and know from experience that most people do not understand any kind of mental illness and they want to blame us because it is so much easier to say “Snap out of it” than to accept we do have an illness not a weakness of character.

    Reply
  16. james
    June 30, 2007 at 3:56 am (10 years ago)

    John, you have much too much time on your hands, and no understanding about life. Get out a little bit more, and meet some men with depression.

    Reply
  17. Diane
    June 30, 2007 at 6:01 am (10 years ago)

    Oh my!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
    I don’t even know what to say.

    Reply
  18. Steph
    June 30, 2007 at 7:03 am (10 years ago)

    All the organization in the world isn’t going to help with depression. Someone sounds like they are envious of the life you lead and want to cut you down to make themselves feel better. Kind of ironic how he says “You can take the easy way out and point fingers and say “poor pitiful me”.” Hmmm yeah that *would* be the easy way out, wouldn’t it John?

    Reply
  19. Jackie
    June 30, 2007 at 8:05 am (10 years ago)

    Asshat.

    Reply
  20. Danielle
    June 30, 2007 at 8:39 am (10 years ago)

    Can someone please clarify something for me? Since when did depression = not enough sleep????

    Reply
  21. slackermommy
    June 30, 2007 at 8:43 am (10 years ago)

    Are you sure this isn’t from Tom Cruise or John Travolta? I’m cracking up at all your comments. They all rock!

    This asshole obviously has a chip on his shoulder. What’s his explanation for my first bout of depression at the age of twelve? Was my book bag not organized enough? Shouldn’t the 12 hours of sleep and a daily nap kept me from getting depressed? This dude needs a Psychology 101 class. Depression is a REAL disease and is not only caused by life experiences but also chemical imbalances and genetics.

    PS: I want have a drink with you also. I have a feeling we could talk for hours.

    Reply
  22. Lene
    June 30, 2007 at 10:39 am (10 years ago)

    What a freak to post such a comment! I am with everyone – he definitely has some issues himself.

    What is that old saying…if you don’t have anything nice to say then don’t say anything at all. Good advice that he should follow.

    If you don’t like what someone’s blog says – don’t read it.

    Reply
  23. Andi
    June 30, 2007 at 11:28 am (10 years ago)

    Dear John,
    I would tell you to bite my ass but it appears you are already talking out of yours. Enjoy your picture perfect life.

    Reply
  24. Jennie
    June 30, 2007 at 1:13 pm (10 years ago)

    So now this brilliant asshole knows the cure for depression? Organization! That’s all it takes? I bet A WHOLE HELL OF A LOT of people would rather pay to have someone organize for them than be depressed….

    So sorry you have to get comments from ignorant people Sara!

    Reply
  25. Cris
    June 30, 2007 at 3:30 pm (10 years ago)

    I am guessing he is commenting on this to you from prison… where he is spending a life sentence after killing his family because they made him crazy when they wouldn’t let him sleep after all of the organizing he did.

    Reply
  26. Aldara
    June 30, 2007 at 3:54 pm (10 years ago)

    I am sooo sorry someone wrote that. They have no idea what they are talking about!!!
    Hugs

    Reply
  27. Sparky Duck
    June 30, 2007 at 6:42 pm (10 years ago)

    John=Jealous Jealous Jackal

    Reply
  28. motherofbun
    June 30, 2007 at 8:31 pm (10 years ago)

    Holy hell. I don’t know what to say either. I want to talk about this later this week. Mind if I link to this post?

    (I have a neighbor who was bitching how her mother’s depressed. And apparently grandma doesn’t watch the kids as much as she used to and it cramping my neighbor’s style ’cause she can’t go out drinking as much as she used to. (Because God forbid she PAY a babysitter.) After her rant she said, ‘I don’t know why my mom can’t just get over it.” Get over it? As a person who’s been through a bout of depression and known what its like to think, “I’m only getting out of bed in hopes that maybe today I’ll get lucky and get hit by a bus.” I was angry at this woman. And she’s no longer someone I consider a good friend.

    Reply
  29. ERin
    June 30, 2007 at 10:27 pm (10 years ago)

    He probably does this on lots of other blogs, too…just to stir things up. What an asshole!!

    Reply
  30. Tina
    July 1, 2007 at 7:16 am (10 years ago)

    It’s somebody who feels bitter about his own life. Taking it out on you. Strange though that a man would take this out on a woman. But maybe he is the husband whose wife had a similar life as yours and something bad happened. He’s taking it out on you.

    Reply
  31. moooooom
    July 1, 2007 at 12:40 pm (10 years ago)

    I think people who have not gone through depression that try to tell someone who is depressed how to “deal” with it is as rediculous as a man telling his wife how to deal with being pregnant, as if he could ever possibly know what that’s like. People who have never had depression haven’t a clue what it is like so they should keep their mouths shut. I have known a few people who have never had clinical depression, but try to be as empathetic as they can while at the same time admitting that they really don’t know what it is like. I wish there were more such creatures out there.

    Reply
  32. Karen
    July 1, 2007 at 12:52 pm (10 years ago)

    okay, he’s just crazy mean and it’s fun to imagine all the reasons why that might be, but none of them have anything at all to do with you and your situation. Sometimes the internet betrays us, but sometimes it saves us…hang in there. I advise printing out his comment and burning it.

    Reply
  33. QueenMother
    July 1, 2007 at 8:31 pm (10 years ago)

    SAVE KATIE SAVE KATIE SAVE KATIE

    That is all.

    Reply
  34. Jo
    July 1, 2007 at 10:06 pm (10 years ago)

    What a jerk! I’m sorry you have to deal with a dipwad like that. 🙁

    Reply
  35. moodswingingmommy
    July 2, 2007 at 1:05 pm (10 years ago)

    What “John” said reminds me of my brother’s words to me right after I was diagnosed with depression….and about 4 months before before he was diagnosed with depression himself.

    That is all. No more feeding the trolls.

    Reply
  36. Casmee
    July 4, 2007 at 6:58 am (10 years ago)

    Sounds like Tom Cruise took on an alias on the web. Idiot!
    Why is everyone an expert and so holier than thou?

    Reply
  37. Cate
    July 6, 2007 at 9:30 am (10 years ago)

    Oh Sara….I’m so far behind in my blog reading….and then I come here and read this, and I feel sick to my stomach. I am so fucking angry right now. What right does this person have to judge, because obviously their life is PERFECT! I want to take this person by the neck, shake them hard and yell “take a FLYING FUCK!”.

    As one of those poor suckers who “feels your pain” because my life is so very “unorganized” (if it was only that easy), I almost feel like I wasn’t there for you when you made this post.

    It’s ignoramuses like this that makes it so hard to deal with depression in the first place….and why it’s great to find others that have dealt with or are dealing with depression…

    Fuck….

    Reply
  38. kellypea
    July 19, 2007 at 12:58 pm (10 years ago)

    I’ve had one run in with a complete freak like this. What amazes me most is that he CHOSE to read your blog. No one forced him. No one twisted his arm. It’s so bizarre. AND, most likely, he wouldn’t have the balls to say any of this to your face.

    Organization. Give me a freaking break. Isn’t it nice that everyone now knows not only what a complete moron he is, but an arrogant one, to boot.

    Such a more important “job” to be out and away from his children when he professes to want to be with them. When there’s a freaking will, there’s a way, right? Get organized, bud, or get over your hissy fit.

    Reply
  39. NilZed
    April 16, 2011 at 1:10 am (6 years ago)

    It is a shame that people continue to think that being a little down, a little unhappy, bummed is ‘depression’. It is NOT. If you can get over it with a few days of concentrating on organizing and de-cluttering, it isn’t depression.

    Depression may or may not have a root in a so-called ‘valid’ cause. Death in the family, divorce, whatever. But it doesn’t have to have any of that, or a continueing reason. It fulfills itself, unfortunately. Being depressed is damned depressing.

    Oh, and hello. I lost track of your blog for a while. I dunno why. Time and Tides. Now I have to read through all of them because I remember you having daughters, but I could swear I just skimmed through a post referring to small sons?? Glad to have stumbled across you again, and that life seems to be going well.

    Reply

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