I’ve been meaning to write on this topic for some time and just haven’t gotten the time or energy to work on the phone book-sized post I know it will be. I am going to sit down in the next week and do it, but in the meantime, I’d like to know your views on it. Do you consider yourself to be a feminist? Was your mother one? How do you think feminism and marriage correlate, and can they do so successfully?

22 Comments on Feminist..Are You?

  1. Jane
    June 10, 2007 at 3:38 pm (10 years ago)

    I definitely consider myself a feminist. My mother might not have called herself one, but she and my grandmother (and great-grandmother, for that matter) all worked and instilled in me the notion that women deserve equality.

    I’m married (yes, I kept my last name), and I see no conflict between marriage and feminism. My husband and I take turns having the “real job” while the other pursues creative work. We split the household tasks and basically act as true, equal partners in our relationship. That’s not to say that everything works out 100% of the time, but we have a basis of mutual respect that helps us work through it.

    Reply
  2. jeanie
    June 10, 2007 at 4:47 pm (10 years ago)

    I would definitely consider myself a feminist – my mother and female forebears did not use (or necessarily like) the term applied to themselves but they believed in the basic principles of equality of the sexes.

    There are possibly some on the radical end of the spectrum who wouldn’t agree with my self-labelling… I am NOT a political lesbian (great post on that at Cassandra Says – http://cassandrasays.blogspot.com/2007/06/weird-ass-late-night-blogging-now-heres.html) …

    (Oh, and here is a split your sides laughing reaction to a radical feminist idea the My Little Ponies promote child pornography that led me to the above post – http://bastantealready.blogspot.com/2007/06/my-little-tally-hos-visual-critique.html#links)

    Sorry for all the links – these are the posts in the last 24 hours that made your question so much more relevant!)

    Reply
  3. Swistle
    June 10, 2007 at 5:52 pm (10 years ago)

    I read somewhere (and I don’t know why I don’t make note of sources when it’s clear I’ll need them later) that a feminist is anyone who considers men and women to be of equal worth. So in that case, yes I’m a feminist.

    Reply
  4. Cakehead
    June 10, 2007 at 6:15 pm (10 years ago)

    A feminist? Yes. A feminist as is typically perceived in today’s society (ala radical)? No. I definately think men and women are equal, and I’d argue quite passionately if someone challenged my thinking. On the flip side, I’d never throw out my bra to announce my freedom (hey, I’ve gotta reign these puppies in – lest they seriously injure someone while free flyin’).

    Reply
  5. AbsolutelyBananas
    June 10, 2007 at 6:16 pm (10 years ago)

    Yes, definitely. The older I get, the more I consider myself a feminist. And the way *I* define it (which is the ONLY way to define it, of course) is someone who believes that a) women and men are equal except sometimes men seem more inept, b) anyone who puts women down because of their gender deserves a horrible punishment, and… well that’s probably it. I can’t stand when I see women putting up with bad behavior from their husbands.

    Reply
  6. Shelly
    June 10, 2007 at 6:28 pm (10 years ago)

    My initial response is immediately to say “yes” but I have to admit that I don’t know what being a feminist means anymore.

    Reply
  7. Toryssa
    June 10, 2007 at 6:43 pm (10 years ago)

    I wouldn’t call myself a feminist. I am not passionate about feminism.

    I believe (of course!) that men and women are equal, but I believe that every human being is equal. As a woman, I do not think of myself as a minority in any way. I’ve never been treated in a way that would make me think that I am lesser for being a woman. There are a lot of differences in men and women, but that doesn’t change the value of either.

    I can’t stand to see PEOPLE treated badly, for any reason.

    Reply
  8. Tina
    June 10, 2007 at 6:59 pm (10 years ago)

    No not a feminist – though not anti feminist either.

    Freedom of choice is a good thing.

    No matter where our choices lie, thanks to the feminist movement of the 70’s we have that freedom.

    Reply
  9. Nell
    June 10, 2007 at 7:39 pm (10 years ago)

    Yes. But I have deeply conflicting feelings about some aspects of feminism and would love to write about it as well, but I think it might be months or maybe years before I get my thoughts in order. I think that this is a really complicated issue, and I can see how it would become one of those posts that you put off until you can really write it for real. I can’t wait to read it.

    Reply
  10. JamieE
    June 10, 2007 at 10:45 pm (10 years ago)

    So complicated. Feminist? Yes. I agree that women have just as much to contribute (if not more) to society as men. I love being able to vote and speak my mind. My mom was a feminist via divorce and didn’t know it. She taught me to be independent, almost too much so. I also agree with the ‘s’ word (submission). And I mean true biblical (eph 5) submission where your husband will lay down his life for you. Not the “my wife is less and I will rule” kind of submission. I do not think that being a sahm makes me less of a feminist. I have felt a lot of pressure from 40-something women to be at work just because I can. I feel I need to be with my kids for now. That’s all

    Reply
  11. Peg
    June 11, 2007 at 7:05 am (10 years ago)

    Yes. Absolutely. I’ve been one all along, but only really accepted the label as my own in the more recent past.

    Now, I am married and this correlates with my feminism perfectly well because my husband is also a feminist, and wants all of our children (his and ours) to embrace feminism. Our making a lifetime commitment to each other through marriage, and my choice to take his name doesn’t detract from that in any way. I wanted his name (it’s way easier than my maiden name, and I got to choose which to use).

    My mother was a feminist, but wouldn’t have ever said so. But she taught me basically that the whole patriarchal set up of our society was a bunch a bullshit–and not to let any man ever tell me what to do or not to do.

    Reply
  12. Sensible One
    June 11, 2007 at 9:05 am (10 years ago)

    No, definitely not. I think defining men and women as equals diminishes their individual talents. I don’t want to do all the things my husband does, and I’m pretty sure he doesn’t want to take over the things I’m good at either. I could get a pretty preachy here, but I’ll just say that the Bible specifically names the husband as the one in charge. Does that mean the wife has to be a doormat? No. It also commands the husband to love his wife, and a loving husband doesn’t bully or take advantage of his wife’s respect.

    There have also been MANY recent studies about the damages we inflict on our children trying to educate them the same way. To really maximize their full potential, boys have to be taught differently than girls. They each have their own strengths and weaknesses. I don’t think there’s anything wrong with that.

    My mother was a wanna-be feminist, IMO, and all that got her was a divorce and the title of Single Parent to Four Children. Oh, and a job, when all she really wanted to do was stay home with us.

    Reply
  13. N
    June 11, 2007 at 9:26 am (10 years ago)

    My wife is my equal, if not completely better than me in so many ways. I’ve always subscribed to a “different but equal” belief in regards to the sexes, and could never be comfortable in a situation where a woman’s role was denigrated, or where she was regarded as a second class citizen (I posted about this last week).

    If this defines me as a feminist, then YES, yes I am. And I’ll wear that badge with honor.

    Reply
  14. Mommy Daisy
    June 11, 2007 at 12:58 pm (10 years ago)

    I do not consider myself a feminist. I think woman have come a long way into being accepted better now than they used to. But, like Sensible One posted above, I see men and women with different roles that are important to each. God has placed men in charge of the household, and that’s how we operate our house. That doesn’t mean my husband tells me what to do. It just means that he’s in charge of ultimately caring for our family.

    Reply
  15. amanda
    June 11, 2007 at 2:17 pm (10 years ago)

    I’m a feminist because I do what makes me happy and fulfilled – not what I feel I “should” be doing. For me, this means my job is my home and family. This is my calling and what I find my purpose in.

    Reply
  16. Jennie
    June 11, 2007 at 7:14 pm (10 years ago)

    So complicated a question… my mom considers herself a feminist but thinks that I am not one. She marched for the ERA.

    My husband doesn’t consider me to be one either.

    But, I CONSIDER MYSELF to be a feminist! And, isn’t that what counts in the end?

    Reply
  17. windex
    June 11, 2007 at 7:45 pm (10 years ago)

    No I am not a feminist as society has defined it. I also agree with the Sensible One. I look forward to your post!

    Reply
  18. Rachel
    June 11, 2007 at 7:47 pm (10 years ago)

    Hell, YES! I’m representing out here in suburbia. I think I am one of three in the county.

    Reply
  19. Amanda
    June 11, 2007 at 9:03 pm (10 years ago)

    I do consider myself to be a feminist.

    Reply
  20. JayMonster
    June 11, 2007 at 10:00 pm (10 years ago)

    This is a tough question, as it really depends on what definition of “feminist” you mean. (And it shows, in some of the answers above).

    I (by most definitions) can not be a feminist since I am a man.

    However, in particular since my daughter was born, have found myself to be far more outspoken on issue’s that concern women than many women are.

    This has led me to be called many things (including a number that can not be repeated on family blog), including an “Alan Alda Feminist” (whatever that may be).

    So where you draw the lines are quite important. I mean sure there are some simple tests to rule some people out such as:

    If you believe that women have “no business” being in the workplace, and should only be home raising the kids. (The Dr. Lou Dobson Rule)

    If you believe that women should have their right to vote taken away. (The Ann Coulter Rule)

    If you believe that feminism is destroying family life. (Pat Robertson Rule)

    Oh, heck to make it easy, if you vote GOP you are not a feminist.

    Reply
  21. Lillie
    September 4, 2007 at 9:47 pm (10 years ago)

    Jaymonster- you should know that being a feminist does not only pertain to women, but includes men as well.

    Reply

Leave a Reply