We had a dinner to go to tonight, hubby’s nephew graduated high school and the celebration was held at a local restaurant that specializes in good southern cuisine. Getting to go out on someone else’s tab is always great, but it’s made ten times better by going to a place that has cole slaw, fried catfish, greens, and fried dill pickles on the menu. Mmmmmmmm, fried dill pickles! I’m drooling all over again.

Since we don’t go out much and it was a celebratory family event I decided to dig into the section of my closet where I keep Dresses That Rarely Get Worn. These are the dresses I pick up because they looked too damn good on me not to buy, and then later have to *find* excuses to wear them. They always seem like a good idea at the time, even if I do get annoyed at having to dust them from time to time. But tonight I had a real excuse to wear one, and I picked a little strapless number that has been longing to see the light of day for a couple months now. I found a pic online, so picture this, only it’s the version with a navy blue print and ribbon instead of red.


So given that I had such a cute dress, I had to go all out on the hair and makeup, and by the time it was all over I could almost pass for a real live female, and not just someone’s mom. I get the kids ready, and we meet hubby and his family at the restaurant. The comments started right away- “Oh wow, look at you all dressed up!” “Wow, a dress AND heels, got a hot date tonight??”. I admit I was basking in the compliments. The twenty minutes it took to hot roll my hair was totally worth it.

There was one thorn in my side during all this, from the most unlikely source- my husband. I know it’s petty, I know it’s stupid, and I know it’s out of character for him so I should let it slide, but damnit, if I go to the trouble of spending forty minutes to get ready for an event, for YOUR family no less, I EXPECT YOU TO TELL ME I LOOK GOOD!

Like I said, it’s petty, I admit it. The state of my self-esteem should not and does not completely hang on whether he likes the dress I am wearing. But would it kill him to remember to say..something? Anything? Especially when everyone around him is doing so? I’m starting to think the 9 years I have invested in this man have not taught him anything. Because if he hasn’t figured out by now that when I pull out the hot rollers by-fucking-god I mean business(!!!), obviously I have not trained him properly. *Sigh*

I am tempted to show up at his next family function in sweats with no makeup and morning breath, just to teach him a lesson. How would you ladies handle this?

16 Comments on Has 9 Years Together Taught This Man Nothing??

  1. shelly
    May 25, 2007 at 11:31 pm (10 years ago)

    Whenever I put makeup on, my kids say “where are you going mom?” If THEY get it, he should be able to, IMHO.

  2. Cate
    May 25, 2007 at 11:48 pm (10 years ago)

    I think us woman/wives/moms need to hear our husbands tell us how amazingly gorgeous we are…at least every once in a while!

    Lately, my husband has been lucky if he’s seen me with my eyebrows on, let alone all “done up”….of course…hot rollers would be useless on me! 😉

  3. Jennifer
    May 26, 2007 at 12:32 am (10 years ago)

    I don’t think it’s petty or stupid of you to expect a tiny little compliment, ESPECIALLY when you’re getting them from others around you. Men just don’t think, sometimes.

  4. Doodaddy
    May 26, 2007 at 1:48 am (10 years ago)

    Remember how dense we are; I’d start with as blatant a statement as possible: “Honey, this is where you tell me how nice I look.” “Darling, it is time for you to examine my appearance and make an appropriate comment.” “Treasure of mine, you may find yourself relegated to the cold, cold sofa if you don’t acknowledge my radiant beauty.”

    Something like that. After a few more years, you might be able to get away with being more subtle.

    But I doubt it.

  5. Swistle
    May 26, 2007 at 5:51 am (10 years ago)

    I don’t think it’s petty to assume he would notice what you look like and acknowledge it. I usually go for the direct approach: “Hel-LO, I am waiting for you to tell me how GORGEOUS I am!!”

  6. Shelly
    May 26, 2007 at 6:13 am (10 years ago)

    Mmmm, I can’t concentrate after you said fried dill pickles… YUM!

  7. Diane
    May 26, 2007 at 7:00 am (10 years ago)

    Oh I’d be PISSED. Then I’d cry you know me the big emotional mess that I am. But doodaddy is right men are dense and he probably saw the fried pickles on the menu and you went flying out of his head!

  8. Karly
    May 26, 2007 at 8:48 am (10 years ago)

    I’m pretty sure I’d wait til we got home and then when he tried to get some I’d just tell him that you don’t feel attractive enough for any lovin’ tonight. After all, he probably thinks your this horrible ugly monster if he didn’t compliment you.

    Why, yes! I am passive agressive!

  9. Salsa
    May 26, 2007 at 8:50 am (10 years ago)

    I don’t think it’s petty and I would be hurt as well.

    Today is my wedding anniversary and I’m getting dolled up and going on a date. I’ll let you know if my man passes the test after 11 years. LOL!

    BTW. Love the dress!

  10. Redneck Mommy
    May 26, 2007 at 9:41 am (10 years ago)

    That dress rawks!! You’re husband has to either have vision problems or rocks in his head. I would ask him about it…right before I beaned him with a pillow.

    I’d be pissed too. And I’m just immature enough to make sure he knows it. But my man is not dopey enough to do this…after ten years of marriage I have him trained on this particular issue…(so many others I am still working on.) Good luck with your re-training.

  11. pinks & blues girls
    May 26, 2007 at 9:58 am (10 years ago)

    Oh, I so feel you here. I don’t know why men don’t understand that just a simple, “You look great” goes a reealllly long way. I hate having to ASK my husband if I look good. And then I get this one: “You always look good.” I guess that should make me happy, but it usually doesn’t. I want to hear, “WOW, you look smokin’ tonight! Every other husband will be so jealous!”

    So, yeah, I hear ya!


    Jane, Pinks & Blues Girls

  12. Cakehead
    May 26, 2007 at 10:11 am (10 years ago)

    He should have said something. It’s not petty. But I’m a super sensitive freak so you might not want to put too much stock into what I say. The grown-up answer is to sit down and have a talk with him about how your feelings were hurt blah blah blah. But the FUN answer is to wear sweats to the next family function 😉 I think I like the latter answer. MWAHAHAHAHA

    PS. I love that dress, I bet you looked smokin’ in it!

  13. problem girl
    May 26, 2007 at 12:11 pm (10 years ago)

    I don’t get how he couldn’t have said anything. That dress is adorable and hello? Hot rollers? What more does that man need to see?

    And I’m sorry, but fried pickles have got to be the most disgusting sounding thing I have ever hear of.

  14. Tina
    May 26, 2007 at 8:19 pm (10 years ago)

    Very cute dress. I would have wanted to hear a “you look nice.” too.

  15. Heather
    May 27, 2007 at 5:47 pm (10 years ago)

    Petty my ass.

    And take it from a gal who has the man trained, showing up in sweats to the next event is NOT the way to go. Get him where it hurts…in the balls. Blue ones that is. This is where I get passive aggressive myself and don’t put out for about 3 weeks. Yeah, the poontang sets the rules! I’m serious.

  16. Diane
    May 27, 2007 at 6:30 pm (10 years ago)

    I’m by no means saying I’m married to the perfect man. However, if I spend more than five minutes in the bathroom and my hair smells of more than just shampoo and conditioner and if I’ve put on more than just a hurried eye liner and mascara, he ALWAYS compliments me. I’m not a dress up kind of person however if a shirt is sliming, he always tells me as well. But, sometimes, I really think he’s a closet metrosexual since he does take 45 minutes in the shower, always smells good, and fusses more over what he’s wearing than I do. 🙂
    I’ve grown accustomed to his compliments however, I still don’t gussy up that often either.


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